I was dawn when I had to wake up. The Sky was dark just
like my thoughts. I had no idea of what was going to happen. The truth is, when
you are eighteen years old, you have to talk to the Brazilian Army. I had to.
When I got there I saw myself in a nonsense line. God,
I was so nervous. The breaking dawn wasn’t making me happier. It was the worst
sun rising ever. I saw it through that cage in the window. Some parents were
outside, two shirtless guys selling water...
I looked forward. Tem lines of men were in front of me
And me, with my 5.9 ft, I felt like a dwarf among giants. So many men. Some of
them were looking brave, other just didn’t fit the place, and me, I was in
panic.
They were men. Me? No, I was no man. I was just a
little boy. A kid. A child who could be wearing a Pokemon T-Shirt, holding a
puppet and using sandals like Tom Sawyer but without looking like him.
I tried looking for other boys. I saw one, lines in
front of me, looking down, staring at men much taller than him.
I heard some boys making fun of the officials. I was
afraid for them. How dare them? Measuring strenght with someone Who holds a
weapon... I’d never do that.
Finally, I understood what I was doing there. I was
afraid, and my fear was looking like confidence. I was supposed to be the boy
that would never give answers, would do anything they asked, even if I couldn’t.
I was the perfect official. And they noticed that.
I was already feeling the uniform’s weight on my
shoulders. I felt the responsibility of wearing it. The hardship of training. And
when the noon sun lighted my face, I knew that I’d have to see, one more time, the
breaking dawn from inside the barrack.
Original: "MENINO OFICIAL" - VIEIRA, Guilherme Moraes
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